The Return of the Living Dead Soundtrack

Before I knew shit about Romero and the original Dead trilogy, there was only one sequel I knew to Night of the Living Dead, and that was Return of the Living Dead(1985). As I would come to find out further down the road, Return wasn't a real sequel as much as an homage or a piggybacking off of Romero's earlier zombie works, much like most of the Italian zombies works from the 70's and 80's. Even after hearing this news I still didn't give a fuck. Return of the Living Dead is still one of my favorite horror movies of all time, despite the camp, no matter how many horror purists chastise me for loving it.

It also has one of the best soundtracks of all time. Sure, it's not composed by Goblin and Morricone, but there aren't that many OST's out there that have such a great line-up of 80's "punk" royalty. The Cramps. TSOL. 45 Grave. Throw in some goth/death rock and a little weirdness from Roky Erickson and your good to go. You can't deny this is classic shit. And thanks to the power of Youtube, I am able to provide you, the general public, with the kick ass soundtrack to drown out an hour of work day sorrows.

(Bear with me.I'm trying to put this in the correct order as seen on the OST but I'm getting different listings from different sources)

1. Take a Walk - Tall Boys



2. Dead Beat Dance - The Damned



3. Burn the Flames - Roky Erickson(for some reason, Youtube doesn't have this song in it's entirety, dammit!!)



4. Nothing For You - T.S.O.L.



5. Surfin' Dead - The Cramps



6. Party Time - 45 Grave



7. Love Under Will - Jet Black Berries



8. Eyes Without a Face - Flesh Eaters



9. Tonight(We'll Make Love Until We Die) - SSQ



10. Trash's Theme - SSQ

Kicking of Fall with The Firm(1989)

Directed by Alan Clarke(Made in Britain(1982), Scum(1979), Elephant(1989))

Starring Gary Oldman( Sid and Nancy(1986), True Romance(1993)) and Philip Davis( Howling V: The Rebirth(1989), Alien³(1992))






Soccer season. Though I am a new found fan of the world's most popular sport, having discovered my love during the 2010 World Cup, coupled with Fall it makes for the most perfect of moods. It has also given me the excuse to ignore my movie-watching process, and a piss-poor excuse at that. Years before I was a fan of the sport, I found myself drawn to some of the folklore surrounding it. By this I speak of Football Hooliganism, an area of interest I've had for a long time stemming from my obsession with British subcultures of the past. It's not behavior I support, mind you, but the Ultra subculture behind The English Disease is something I have always found somewhat fascinating. It's because of this that I've taken come to enjoy such films Green Street Hooligans and I.D. in the past, and as of this morning, The Firm(1989), starring one Gary Oldman.

Oldman plays the slightly yuppy-ish Bix Bissell, real estate agent by day, mustached gang leader by night. Bix and his crew, Inter City Crew, are rabid supporters of West Ham United, one of London's most popular Football Clubs who's real-life supporters happen to be notorious. The England National Team is about to head to mainland Europe for the European Championship, and Bix has big plans of leading a team of hooligans comprised of several other firms. Unfortunately, the other firm bigwigs aren't fond of this idea unless the ICC can beat the other gangs fair and square the only way they know how..through sheer brutality. Just how far is Bix willing to go to lead his envisioned super crew in Europe?

At a very short 67 minutes, it's no surprise that The Firm is a made-for-tv movie. What is surprising though, is how much of a full- length event the director was able to fit into a little over an hour. I'm guessing it had a lot do do with the quality of the actors present, something most of the movies I review don't really have. Even though most of the actors, with the exception of Oldman are no-names in the USA, there is definitely something to be said for the quality you get on the BBC.

I can honestly say I was expecting more a gang of skinheads than one of ultra-violent yuppies before I started this movie, knowing both the history of the director and similar roles Oldman had played during this time period. It was a pleasant surprise though that was tied up in a 10-second news blurb while the gang were watching the telly, a scene I'm sure was purposely thrown in the mix because I probably wasn't the only one thinking these thoughts. Again my obsession with British subculture getting ahead of me. It makes sense though, seeing as the hooligan movement starting taking a more "casual" approach to dress in 70's to avoid altercations with the authorities.

Thanks to The Firm, I will be spending the next couple of days, or weeks even, indulging my obsessions with all things football and skinhead related, so don't be surprised if the next couple of reviews are related. At that, if you're able to procure a copy of the Firm, covet it, because it will in no way be a wasted expense.



Not wanting to cut this short, but I've got a 2:00 Shamrock Rovers match to watch.

Terrorvision(1986)

Directed by Ted Nicolaou( Ragewar(1984), Subspecies(1991), Bad Channels(1992))

Starring Diane Franklin( Better Off Dead(1985), The Last American Virgin(1982)), Mary Woronov( Death Race 2000(1975), Rock'n'Roll High School(1979)), and Gerrit Graham( Cannonball(1976), Demon Seed(1977))




I've been on a small Diane Franklin kick as of late. Who is this Franklin girl you ask? All it takes is two words and you will know who I'm talking about..International Language. If you guessed "cute French girl from Better Off Dead, the greatest comedy ever made" then you guess correct, my friend. This was the girl that was the archetype for my vision of feminine perfection when I was a teenager, and probably still exists somewhere in the complex mind of Steve the Adult to this day. She was a bit of a teenage crush, but it wasn't the actress herself as much as the character she portrsyed. If it were the other way, I would probably hold Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure to the same light as Better Off Dead.

So after seeing The Last American Virgin a couple weeks back, I spent a little time perusing Franklin's IMDB entry and discovered the entry for Terrorvision(1986). Seeing that it was executive produced by one Charles Band, I knew it was something I had to see. Ten minutes into the film and it was an instant favorite, or at least somewhere in the top 100 or 200(I watch a lot of movies).

The Planet Pluton dispenses it's garbage much like scientists have been telling us we should do it for years..by shooting it as far into space as possible. Much like humans, the "Plutonians" believe if you can't see it, it must not exist anymore. As an advanced species, the Plutonians just don't launch garbage piles into space via rockets. Instead, garbage matter is converted into energy and shot into that deepest and darkest depths of the Final Frontier. Unfortunately, one such "garbage beam" headed towards Earth ends up bouncing off a couple of satellites, causing the trash beam to be directed into the home of the Puttermans. Unfortunetly, one Plutonian's trash is not necessarily another man's treasure, unless you consider a man-eating, mutant space fido your idea of gold doubloons.

Sounds pretty awesome so far, doesn't it? I don't really think the summary I gave will really do it as much justice as Terrorvision is deserved because the characters are what really make this cheese factory of a flick shine.

Stanley and Raquel Putterman - The parental units. Not exactly Ozzie and Harriet, but it'd the 80's so it's totally okay for a middle-aged yuppie couple to openly swing in front of there kids and hang x-rated bondage art all over the common areas of the house.

Grampa - a veteran survivalist who has a dream of one day marketing lizard tails as a renewal food resource.

Sherman Putterman - When is the last time you say a 10 year old kid who looked natural carrying an automatic weapon?

Suzy Putterman - Played by Franklin herself. The oldest child and a punk rock princess, she has a taste for metalheads and the brains of a piece of plywood.

O.D. - Suzy's boyfriend. Doesn't have much going in the brains department, but he rocks a WASP tee and studded leather gauntlets. By far, the best character in the film.

Throw in horribly written dialogue, PG-13 comedy, R-rated gore, and a decently designed puppet mutt and you have yourself a keeper. Did I mention that Charles Band was not only the executive producer, but he also wrote the music? What can't that fuckin' guy do?!?

Unless you a fan of other 80's horror/comedy classics like House and Critters, you might not get as much of a kick out of Terrorvision as I did. It is definitely more for the Killer Klowns crowd than the slasher and gore purists out there. I would never try to sell Terrorvision to my horror aficionado roommate for fear of a straight 90 minutes of whining. But if you're more Freddie Kreuger than Michael Myers, this could be right up your alley.

Turkish Star Wars and Blood Diner Haunt the Spectacle Midnite Screen This Weekend

For those of you who were eagerly awaiting my NYC happenings last week, I'm sorry to disappoint. I spent the weekend in New England with friends and family. Yes, there are actaully things in life that come before Grindhouse cinema. Thankfully, Spectacle has so much shit going on this weekend, and can't be contained in one blog entry.


I should really try to write this sooner, because tonight kicks down the door to the weekend with Dr. Caligari(1989), an 80's adaption to the classic silent horror from almost a century ago.

Spectacle says - "Meet the surrealistic psychiatrist with the camp couch. She's totally twisted and continuing the mind bending experiments of her grandfather, the original Dr. Caligari. She treats her patients like human lab rats as she swaps their psychoses with cross cranial conulations. Witness the sexual fantasies of a lovely, lust-crazed Dr. Caligari -- an eroto-maniac! You'll be shocked by her high voltage therapy for a 'juiced-up' cannibal. Sigmund Freud is turning somersaults in his mausoleum over this doctor's demented diagnosis. Fall victim to the captivating Dr. Caligari! "I can't possibly make it sound as good as it is by describing it. I'm afraid I must demand that you see this for yourself with your analyst! Dr. Caligari is the biggest explosion of eclectic erotica in years, and it can sizzle your brain!"


Tomorrow night, August 12th, the perverted fucks over at Lunchmeat VHS and Horror Boobs are bringing down the house with a screening of the schlocktastic classic, Blood Diner(1987).


IMDB says - "Two cannibals/health food diner owners are on a wacky quest to restore life to the five million year old goddess Shitaar. Aided by their uncle's brain and penis, the two set about getting the required parts - virgins, assorted body parts from whores, and the ingredients for a "blood buffet". Their adversaries are the police: the chief with a Russian accent, the "player" detective, and the new Yorker with an Australian accent."


On Saturday, August 13th, we get the cherry on top of the cheese-flavored cake, because Spectacle is showing THE crowning achievement in Turkish cinema, The Man Who Saves the World, known affectionately worldwide as Turkish Star Wars(1982). A film of my own heart, I reviewed this film years ago when I first started this blog (review here). This is the film that was made for people who read this blog. People erect monuments and devote websites to it's greatness. If you have not seen it this is the weekend to finally feel what it's like to be touched by God aka Turkish action hero, Cüneyt Arkin.

Spectacle says - "
Presenting the no-budget, schlocky, shamelessly poor and shockingly inept sci-fi curio Turkish Star Wars (aka Dünyayi Kurtaran Adam/ dir. Çetin Inanç/ 1982/ 91min) a hilarious and gloriously bad movie for the ages that borrows liberally from LucasFilm (pirated effects shots from “A New Hope” and, oddly, John Williams’ theme from “Raiders of the Lost Ark,” repeated over and over) and barely bothers to make the slightest bit of sense.

"The film follows the adventures of Murat and Ali, whose spaceships crash on a desert planet following a battle, depicted by using footage from SW as well as Soviet and American space program newsreel clips. While hiking across the desert, they speculate that the planet is inhabited only by women. Murat does his "wolf whistle", which he uses on attractive women. However, he blows the wrong whistle and they are attacked by skeletons on horseback, which they defeat in hand-to-hand combat. The villain soon shows up and captures the heroes, bringing them to his gladiatorial arena so they can fight. The villain tells them he is actually from Earth and is in a 1,000 year old wizard. He tried to defeat Earth, but was always repelled by a shield of concentrated human brain molecules, which looks a lot like the Death Star..."

Check link below: Film Threat on the peculiar Turkish tradition of appropriating Hollywood blockbusters and “remaking them on a budget roughly equivalent to the price of lunch at a neighborhood kebab shop.” (contains spoilers.) After the screening we’ll drink and discuss which was more uncalled for: this lunacy or Lucas' ill-advised prequels."

Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

They Call Her One Eye and Torso Make the Midnite Rounds This Weekend in Brooklyn

It's another Grindhouse three-day weekend at Spectacle this week. Rather than write separate entries for each feature screening at Brooklyn's best theater, Spectacle, I decided to throw all three films in one big blog entry. Not only does it make it easier for all of you with interest in the theater itself, it makes it easier for me because I don't have to keep up the "now showing" entries at Spectacle for the rest of the weekend, which is something I've been slipping with lately.

The Midnite Madness kicks off tonight with the Italo Post-Apocalyptic trash bag, Exterminators of the Year 3000(1983)



IMDB says - "The year 3000, after a nuclear war turned the earth into a desert. A group of survivors in a cave runs out of water and desperately needs new supply. The last guy they sent out didn't return. His 10 years old son Timmy wants to join the next team. They know where they'll find a well, but the problem it the way there, which is controlled by a savage gang of motorcyclists under the bloodthirsty Crazy Bull. A lonesome stranger who Timmy meets on the way may help. "

Now this is the only movie of the three I have not seen, but since it's an Italian genre movie AND Post-Apoc I feel that no matter what the ratings are on IMDB (4.5 out of 10)it's still going to be awesome. I'm not at all familiar with the director, Giuliano Carnimeo, but going over his IMDB entry I see he was actually a pretty prolific director and directed movies I've heard of like The Case of The Bloody Iris(1972). Going to see this tonight can only be a great start to the weekend.

I have not only seen tomorrow's slice-of-awesome They Call Her One Eye(1974) but I've actually written a review for it(here). Out of all the rape-victim-goes-revenge films I've watched over the last few months, this is by far my favorite, and it has nothing to do with the XXX shots. You can always count on Swedish filmmakers of the 70's to go above and beyond the call of duty when making a proper revenge flick.



Spectacle says - "Swedish sexploitation star, Christina Lindberg, stars in this brutal rape-revenge classic directed by Bo Arne Vibenius (who had previously worked with Ingmar Bergman as an assistant director on Persona and unit director on Hour of the Wolf). After being abducted on her way to school one morning, Frigga/Madeleine is held hostage by a scumbag who gets her hooked on heroin and prostitutes her ass to various clients. She eventually ventures out to do some firearm and martial arts training so she can avenge all the sleazy Swedes who raped her and took out one of her eyes. The ultra-ultra slo-mo sequences of Frigga/Madeleine blasting away her prey is both chilling and hilarious.

The film has been referenced by both Abel Ferrara in Ms. 45 and by Quentin Tarantino in Kill Bill Vol. 1. Lindberg has gone on to make numerous eurosleaze flicks as well as become a prominent journalist in Sweden."

And last but not least we have the giallo Torso(1973), a film I first became familiar with after seeing the poster numerous times when I practically used to pay rent at Brooklyn's infamous metal bar, Duff's. I tried to make it a goal to watch every single movie Jimmy had posters for. As far as I know, I got pretty far. Again, this is one of those movies I am very familiar with and have reviewed(here).



Spectacle says - "One Day She Met A Man Who Loved Beautiful Women...

BUT NOT ALL IN ONE PIECE!

A series of sex murders shock a college campus, and four beautiful young girlfriends head for the safety of an isolated country villa. But as they succumb to their own erotic desires, their weekend of pleasure becomes a vacation to dismember at the hands - and blade - of the lecherous maniac.

Starring Suzy Kendall (THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE) and Tina Aumont (SALON KITTY), this Euro Horror chiller was originally released in America with much of its controversial violence removed by censors.

Presented in its Uncensored English Version."

Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Samurai Cop(1989) at Midnite tonight in Brooklyn

I knew nothing about the movie Samurai Cop(1989), which is going to be screening at Spectacle this evening, but from watching the trailer all I have to say is HOLY SHIT. I don't really know how I passed this straight-to-VHS spectacular up, but it looks like an amazing piece of work. Bad dialogue, martial arts, and triumphant hair. You really can't go wrong with triumphant hair. I can't believe a mane that glorious is actually going to be shown on the big screen. Williamsburg is going to be jealous.

Spectacle says - "You have the right to remain silent … dead silent!
Joe Marshal, nickname “The Samurai,” is an expert in Japanese culture and martial arts and if it takes a blood drenched street brawl to bring the mobster’s to their knees, then Samurai Joe is ready to RUMBLE!”"

Not enough for ya? An IMDB user has this to say - "Samurai Cop is sure to please all fans of B-cinema. There are many scenes in this gem that will have you doubled over with laughter. From the initial car chase, to the slow motion katana duel between Matt Hannon and Robert Z'Dar, this movie screams cheese. Its aborted plot revolves around the titular character, Joe Marshall, the "samurai" cop (played by Matt Hannon), who has been transferred from San Diego to Los Angeles in order to assist the LAPD in taking down the troublesome Katana gang. Marshall, so we are told, has trained with the masters in Japan, and so ostensibly has some greater insight into the inner-culture of the Katana. What his expertise is exactly is hard to say, however, because he sneeringly mumbles Japanese names as if they were utterly foreign to him. Indeed, the only thing Marshall does do effectively is hitting on every woman he meets in the most sleazy and tactless manner conceivable. With far more brawn than brain, it is pretty clear from the get-go that Marshall won't be thinking his way through this flick."

Friday, July 15th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Personally the Spectacle blurb was enough for me, but if you need more to go on, the trailer will have you sold.

Troma Night at reRun Tomorrow Night with Toxie and Mother's Day(1980)

I haven't been to a Troma party since the NYC premiere of Poultrygeist a couple years back, but I can tell you one thing, Lloyd Kaufman knows how to throw a fucking party. I'm pretty sure that I have missed several Troma events since then. This is NYC, the home of Troma Studios and the basis for the fictional community of Tromaville. So I'm going to try my damndest not to miss this one, especially if the Toxic Avenger is going to be around for that perfect portrait to plaster on my Placebook Page...um..I mean Facebook page (sorry, got caught in the moment). I guess I should probably tell you why Troma is coming to Brooklyn. Tomorrow night, for ONE NIGHT ONLY, Troma Studios is going to be giving NYer's the first sneak peak of it's family fun classic Mother's Day(1980), brought to you in HD in a director's cut. Oooooooooooooo!!!! And it's FREE to boot.

reRUN says - "Lovin' sons always do what their mothers tell them to… even if it’s to KILL!!! The Troma Team is proud to bring you Charles Kaufman's MOTHER'S DAY, the 1980 indie horror classic which redefines the term "family values." This stylish, horrific and darkly humorous film is a worldwide favorite, a celebration of gore and depravity in the spirit of THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE and IGOR & THE LUNATICS and certain to offend the weak of heart.
When three beautiful young women set out for a relaxing weekend retreat in the woods, they unwittingly stumble upon a sadistic band of backwoods yokels. Taken prisoner by the insane matriarch and her demented sons, the women are forced to fight back using anything they can get their hands on. Heads roll, blood spurts, and genitals are mutilated as the women use myriad objects to do battle with Mother's loving sons. Their MOTHER'S DAY will leave you feeling frightened, amazed, and downright disgusted!"

Did you know that...Shot across the lake at the same time the original Friday the 13th (1980/I) was being filmed.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 22nd a 7pm ReRun Gastropub Theater(Next to ReBar) 147 Front St. at Jay St. Dumbo, Brooklyn

Slumber Party Massacre(1982) Friday at Midnite

Besides the classic standards (Friday the 13th, Halloween, and Nightmare on Elm Street), I'm not as well versed in the 80's slasher films as most of my compatriots in the horror community are. I don't think this makes me any worse of a person, but there are a shitload of trashy slasher flicks out there that I could have been renting in the 80's instead of the same kung-fu flicks over and over. Over the last several years I have been a bit obsessed with Giallo, and because of this interest I have found myself going back and watching the slashers I didn't get a chance to see 20 years ago. One I have been meaning to see for a long time is Slumber Party Massacre(1982). Not as much for it being a missed part of my movie-watching childhood. but more for the fact that it's a Roger Corman production, and I love the shit out of that guy. Thankfully Spectacle Theater is giving it a Midnite Screening this Friday, so not only do I finally have an option in front of me, I have an option with beer, popcorn, and a big screen.

Spectacle Theater says - "One of the great vintage cocktails of 80s horror is mixing in Roger Corman's school of budget filmmaking with some feminist horror and you come up The Slumber Party Massacre. 1982 brought many classic genres films, and the first of The Slumber Party Massacre trilogy is definitely one of them. This film starts out looking like your standard exploitation flick with gratuitous shots of T&A captured in a high school girls' locker room. Some middle-aged maniac with a jean jacket and an overly phallic drill is killing off these nubile LA suburban specimens as they frolic around during a slumber party one evening, doing the usual hijinks that middle-class girls do like smoke pot and eat pizza. The psycho killer's identity is never a mystery and his motivation is never really clear, except that he loves his female victims.

What makes this film unique in slasher film lore is that not only was it written by a feminist, but helmed by a young lady who turned Steven Spielberg's offer to edit E.T. She certainly chose wisely by accepting Mr. Corman's offer to make her directorial debut with The Slumber Party Massacre, a vintage 80s slasher horror film with gory kills, cheesy dialogue and future Scream Queen, Brinke Stevens, but that makes it much more satisfying than today's post-modern, ironic attitude towards Reagan-era horror fodder. Damn Hollywood if they ever decide to do a remake!
-- EME"

Did you know: Rita Mae Brown wrote a screenplay for a parody of teen/slasher flicks and titled it "Sleepless Nights". However, when she submitted it to the producers, they filmed it as if it weren't a parody and retitled it "Slumber Party Massacre". As a result, the movie displays a lot more humor, both intended and unintended, than others of this genre.(courtesy of IMDB)

Friday, June 17th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Critters(1986)

Directed by Stephen Herek(Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure,Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead)

Produced by Rupert Harvey(Android,A Nightmare on Elm Street: The Dream Child)

Starring Dee Wallace(The Stepford Wives,The Hills Have Eyes,Alligator II: The Mutation),Scott Grimes(Critters 2,Night Life) and Terrance Mann(Critters 2, Solar Babies,Big Top Pee-Wee)

"Dude, we're gonna spend the afternoon watching Critters and House."

"Critters sucks, but I think House is cool."

"What do you mean Critters sucks? It's a classic 80's horror comedy."

"Critters is nothing but a poor man's Gremlins."

...and so went the brief conversation I had with my roommate/best friend Nate as he was leaving the apartment on Sunday. I was in shock. How could one who loves schlock as much as I do have hatred for the Critters? It baffled me to no end. Whatever. I let the haterade spill and continued on with the only plans I had for Sunday...to watch two of my favorite horror-comedies from the year 1986 with my best girl. A plan which was executed perfectly. Gremlins rip-off??? Please....

Critter(1986) is one of those 80's movies I assume everybody has seen, but then I realized not everybody is a fan of goofy sci-fi, or even from the same generation as myself, so let me break it down for you. The Critters, aka The Crites, are an extraterrestrial species that can be best described as carnivorous tribbles with huge appetites. Sounds cute, right? Not so much with these toothy, little furballs. Not only do the crites eat everything in sight, edible or not, but the more they eat, the bigger they get. You could say everything they eat goes straight to their hips, and I don't believe they actually have hips. Like tribbles, the cute doesn't last long once you realize they are more of plague than possible plaything. Chances are that this is probably why several of the little, furry fuckers are being held captive on a prison by the galactic powers-that-be. Unfortunately, crites aren't as base as you would think and they actually have the ability to solve complex problems, like stealing a space vessel for escape and headed towards earth. Thankfully, the Crites are being tailed by Ug and his parner, two faceless bounty-hunting bipeds who can take on the facial features of any human they contact to better blend in on alien worlds. Unfortunately, Ug can't get to Earth fast enough to stop the Crites from tormenting a small rural community and we get to see just how destructive 8 little furballs can be.

Obviously, the movie Critters would never have existed if it wasn't for the commercial success of Gremlins, but I wouldn't go as far as to call it a rip-off. Nate's "Poor Man's Gremlins" is a more accurate description. Either way, I don't care. I first saw the movie in theaters way back when, and have probably seen it a dozen times since then, I'll probably see it a dozen or more times in the next decade. I do admit that the older I get the cheesier the movie becomes, and that's not necessarily a bad thing. I live for cheese!

I realize the most of the special effects in the movie revolve around mediocre puppeteering, but that is just one of the things that makes Critters more of a comedy than the actual sci-fi horror that it was intended to be. Other things include the Johnny Steele music video and Dee Wallace's over-the-top acting ability. The screaming-in-horror that women can do kept me in tears for the latter half of the movie. Completely ridiculous! I'm actually wondering why Dee wasn't cast in every slasher movie of the 70's and 80's based on her scream alone.

We all know that New Line Cinema were never a company for the high brow, so those of you who were disappointed after the first time you watched this classic should have known better. New Line Cinema and movies like Critters, Killer Klowns, and Night of the Creeps set the bar for comedy-tinged horror and sci-fi during the 80's, and you can still see the influence such films have on movies of the same vein today. So before you, or somebody you know, rants and raves about how much movies like Critters are shit, think about the source of these films and those they might have influenced in the future.

Kung-Fu at Midnite Tomorrow Night in Brooklyn

I knew it wasn't going to be long before Spectacle started kicking out the kung-fu flicks, seeing that they have been nailing down the Midnite market for a while now. Hopefully it won't be long now before we start seeing some spaghetti western action. Tomorrow night, avenge your master or father, with psychedelics, in Williamsburg with a Midnite screening of The Boxer's Omen(1983).

Spectacle says - "This is one of the strangest, most hallucinatory visions ever put on film, from the legendary Shaw Bros. Epic horror by way of martial arts action, kung-fu mystery, tinged with Buddhist mysticism and nightmarish psychedelia. Hoping to avenge his brother - paralyzed in the ring by a Thai gangster - and lift a centuries-old family curse, a Chinese boxer travels to Thailand and joins with a band of fighting monks in a supernatural odyssey fraught with crazed wizards, ghosts, monsters, rabid bats, and the reanimated corpses of fully naked women."

Saturday June 11th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Savage Streets(1984) Friday at Midnite

With the exception of seeing The Exorcist at a very early age, my most prominent memory of Linda Blair was playing a young vigilante bent on her sister's revenge in the movie Savage Streets(1984). Now understand that this was close to 30 years ago since it was released on cable/VHS. I can't really recall the medium it was released on, because I wasn't even old enough to get funny feelings in my points. I do remember that it probably wasn't a movie I should have been watching at the age of ten, and it was the first example of rape/revenge film I had ever seen, and it kind of shook me up for years to come. Over the last several years, I had wanted to see if the film still gave me the same feelings of "disgust" I had experienced decades back, the only problem is I couldn't remember the title. It was only recently that I discovered the name of this lost memory, unfortunately there is only so many movies I can watch with the current levels of cinema obsession my life currently works with. Judging by the trailer, I don't even understand why this possible piece of garbage shook me up, but it sure looks like a bunch of fun to watch.

This week there is no reason for me to put off seeing Savage Streets because Spectacle Theater is going to be screening it Midnite on Friday. I've put off lots of movies I write about before, but I don't really know if I can in this case. The best part of it is the cost is only a 5 spot.

Spectacle says - "Los Angeles circa 1984, B-movie scream queen, Linnea Quigley, plays the sacrificial virgin that spawns big sis, played by pea-soup spewing veteran, Linda Blair, to seek revenge on a posse of scumlords called The Scars.
Get ready for a very anti-PC, camp-romp of Reagan-era trash fodder. An outrageous depiction of high school life via BIG HAIR, BIG BREASTS and BIG FIST-PUMPING ROCK SCORE! You’ll be certain to chant out “Justice For One” while exiting the theater. Not to be missed!"

Friday, May 13th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Manchurian Avenger(1985)

As a genre movie buff, I am always game to watch a film that doesn't stay within the confines of a single style. Who wouldn't be, it's not like being a trash cinema purist is going to get you anywhere in life besides negative Twitter feedback, if that. So when I first heard of the film Shanghai Joe, a mixed bag kung-fu/spaghetti western, there were no if-ands-or buts that it was something I had to get my hands on. To tell you the truth, if you throw martial arts into any type of film I will probably want to watch it. Unfortunately the copy I procured of Shanghai Joe had a one or two minute delay in the sound, and there is no way in Hell I can watch something like that. So I threw it in the garbage, annoyed and defeated.

Not too long ago I came across yet another cross-genre film of the same variety. Since I am easy to please I figured I might as well give it a shot. Besides the lead actor looks like an Asian Charles Bronson, so I figured it had to be awesome, Right?

Not quite.

Manchurian Avenger(1985) kicks off with Joe, a Chinese "immigrant" heading back to the land of his upbringing. Not that we actually know where Joe is headed back from. Is it China? Is it Frisco? Nobody really knows, probably not even Joe himself. All we know is that he looks like Bronson and doesn't really use his mouth to talk much. He says it all with fists and feet. After a couple of skirmishes with racist whites and Mexican bandits, the latter which results in Joe making a friend, Joe comes back home to find out that the uncle who raised him has been killed, and his "cousin" is bedridden after an improper stomping by a gang of racist white thugs. Despite the crackerness of these dirty thugs, it just so happens they happened to be employed by a local Chinese "Warlord" who happens to go by the name Cheng. Not only does Cheng have most of the townsfolk living in fear, but he is also responsible for the death of Joe's uncle in a quest for hidden gold. By the time Cheng is introduced, Joe has already fought his way, mustache and all, through dozens of crackers and bandidos. How hard can an old Chinese guy be to destroy. You see, Cheng has a secret weapon, and it's magic. Not only is he a wizard but he also employs "The Four Winds", who I can only guess are supposed to be ancient Chinese spirits who live in a western cave. Chinese Spirits who also happen to be multicultural. Apparently the Heavenly Dynasty is an Equal Opportunity Employer. Yay affirmative action!!

I didn't hate Manchurian Avenger but I didn't exactly love it. Let's just say I'm not going to pressure anybody into watching it in the near future, if at all. It is what it is, which is a low-budget, American-made martial arts flick. I'm pretty sure the only reason that it wasn't a full on kung-fu/wuxia movie is probably due to a lack of Asian actors in that part of Colorado during the early 80's. Through in a bunch of whites and latinos while filming in the Western US, and you got yourself a cross-genre spectacular, even if it wasn't. The effort was made, but I don't think there really was any pay-off to Avenger, at least from what I can see on the IMDB page. From the looks of it, the director and writer never made another attempt at filmmaking, which is kind of sad, because this movie wasn't horrible. Sure it takes a special kind of person to find enjoyment in this shit, but it could have been worse. The action was a bit lagging and could have been a lot more prevalent to make up for the lack of acting ability present. The martial arts scenes were actually pretty solid, unfortunately only a couple of the actors possessed actual skills, which probably accounts for the lack of enough fight sequences.

But again, what do you expect out of a kung-fu flick directed and produced by a couple of whiteboys from Colorado? It may not have been perfect for a martial arts connoisseur such as my self, but I can honestly say a good attempt was made. It's just too damn bad the filmmakers gave up after there first try.

Get Some Bolly-Horror For Your Midnite Fix Tomorrow

Spectacle Theater, Williamsburg's finest purveyors of weekend Midnite Movie entertainment, are going balls out with the Bollywood movies this weekend. So, as you would expect it, tomorrow night's Midnite Movie is going to fall in line with the standard presentations, but with an Indian Twist. So if the Southern Asian cinema is your cream of the crop, take the time out of your busy Friday night drinking schedule to check out Purana Mandir(1984), which is "widely regarded as the greatest Bollywood horror movie of all time".

IMDB says - "Suman lives a wealthy lifestyle along with her widower dad, Thakur Ranvir Singh, and an unmarried aunt, Damyanti, in a palatial house in Bombay. They are direct descendants of Raja Hariman Singh of Bijapur. When Ranvir finds out that Suman is in love with a middle-classed male, Sanjay, he expresses displeasure and forbids her to ever see him again. When she persists, he tells her that there is a curse on the entire family - a curse that was inflicted 200 years ago by a blood-thirsty, flesh-eating demon named Samri. This curse impacts only women in their family, who are hideously transformed after giving birth to their firstborn, and die a painful death. Treating this as mere superstitious, Suman and Sanjay, along with Sanjay's friend, Anand and his wife, Sapna, set out to Bijapur to unearth and put an end to this rumor - not knowing that soon they will resurrect a virtually indestructible Samri."

Friday, May 6th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

If the description can't convince you check out the trailer below. Singing, martial arts, hindi-wolfmen, and blood showers....what's not to love?

The Shining at Midnite Tomorrow...with a Twist

For the first couple of decades of my life, I could honestly say the scariest movie I had ever seen was The Shining(1980). Many people I've met over my life would agree, and if not it is most definitely considered one of the best horror movies of all time. From beginning to end, with creepy twins, blood waves down hallways, and ghosts dressed up in dog suits, I had nightmares based on the movie for most of my childhood.

Speaking of beginning to end, Spectacle Theater in Williamsburg is going to screening it as such, and vice versa. By this, I mean that a special version of the film will be shown forwards and backwards simultaneously. Sounds interesting, doesn't it? Did I mention this was going to screened in a Williamsburg theater? This is why I'm not really surprised. Some of you might find the idea interest, I on the other hand, am a purist when it comes to the scariest movie of my childhood. For those of you unsure, check out the sample at the bottom of this entry. It looks like it could be fun, to say the least, especially under the influence of hallucinogenics.

Thursday, May 5th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Killing More Creeps with Death Wish 3(1985)

It's nice to be able to count on AMC to provide me with the right kind of entertainment a guy like me needs when he's sitting at a dive bar drinking whiskey shots and Pabst Blue Ribbon. No, I'm not speaking of The Walking Dead or Mad Men, although I was quite impressed with the former(and zombies do go with said whiskey and cheap beer indulgence). If you've been paying attention at all this week, then you would have noticed the AMC is running a Death Wish marathon. Yeah you heard me correctly, a Death Wish marathon. So while you were out enjoying "weather" and talking about useless Brits getting married, I was watching Paul Kersey take down punks with over-sized weapons while fueling myself with Wings and booze.......America!!!

A couple of months ago I covered Death Wish 2 after having watched it back-to-back with the original. I have held a special place in my heart for Charles Bronson for a while now, but it was only recently that I had screened the Death Wish series. Hearing that the first two were the best, I decided to take my time with the third to avoid disappointment so quickly after seeing the second. Three months later and I finally got my turn or the Bronson-mobile, and I didn't even have to pay for it. I just happened to be lucky enough to catch Death Wish 3 on AMC last night after my afternoon 90210. For all of you people out there that told me the first two were really the only ones worth watching, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? Death Wish 3 was by far my favorite of the series, and I saw part of the fourth, so I know it doesn't get better from there on out.

If you've haven't seen it, I should probably summarize it for you:

Everyone's favorite vigilante and World's Unluckiest Man, Paul Kersey, makes his way back to NYC, to visit his war buddy after living in "Exile" out in Los Angeles for the last several years. As we all know from the first two movies, death and sadness follow Kersey around like a venereal disease. Paul just happens to get to get to his friends apartment as he and his wife were slaughtered by the neighborhood hoodlums....go figure. This unfortunately leads to Paul being taken into custody(more bad luck). The Department Head, who's name I can't remember or even care to, remembers the name Kersey being associated with the vigilante justice that lowered Manhattan's crime-rate, even if it was temporary, just a few years before. Since then, said Department Head has been given the duty of an area of Brooklyn known affectionately as East New York, and he can't seem to keep to piece. You see, East New York is rundown and overrun with gang violence that would make Somalian ghettos look like the suburbs. Since Department Head doesn't feel that he, nor his squadron, can really do anything to help out the pathetic vestiges of good residents left in the area, he conscripts Kersey to help clean up. And Kersey only knows one way to deal with punks, or in this case, creeps.......superior firepower!

The Third installment of Death Wish got a bunch of shit from the critics for being to unrealistic and over the top. From what I've read, even Bronson was embarrassed by the direction it took. Bully for them, because everything that was hated about Death Wish 3 was what kept my eyes glued to the screen. Non-stop violence, big guns, Kersey's ability to bed a women by the second date...it was all here. Best of all were the roving gangs of punks, and you know how much I love that shit. Yes, I agree the plots of the first two films were better scripted, but who needs a fucking storyline with this much action. By the third installment, I would just expect Kersey to have a free pass to smoke punks anywhere he went in the world and I would have been happy and Three actually gave me that, even though it was restricted to an area of Brooklyn that is still one of the worst neighborhoods in America.

I agree with the "unrealistic" criticism people give it, but that's the kind of shit that makes a great action/revenge movie. People don't watch these type of films to relate whole-heartedly, they do it to live that kind of fantastic lifestyle, even if it is just for 90 minutes. Death Wish 3 was just to good to limit to a review and one blog entry. I think I'm going to have to give it further thought tomorrow. I don't rate movies very often, but in this case, it's a 5 of 5 bar none.

Dead End Drive-In(1986)

Since falling in love with the doc Not Quite Hollywood the other day, I have become obsessed with the idea of tracking down as many of the movies covered as I can. As I explained in that review, I'm not well versed in Ozploitation, but I sure as hell want to be. With so much to choose from, I wanted to start off my obsessive sequence of Aussie reviews with the movie that grabbed at me the most, and also because it was one of the last films covered. According to the industry specialists, it is also considered the last big Ozploitation film before the movements death at the hands of the straight-to-video industry. If you've seen the documentary, or read the title of this blog entry, you most likely know that I am talking about Dead End Drive-In(1986).

Dead End Drive-In takes place in a bleak future, I guess some people might refer to it as "Dystopian", although the only "planned and structured society" seems to take place in small, controlled areas, namely drive-in theaters. This isn't common knowledge though, as we can see from the ignorance of our hero, Jimmy, known affectionately as Crabs. It's hard to tell if crabs is an idiot, or just a really good guy. Society is crumbling around him, but he spends most of the time jogging and boxing. Despite the fact that he can't go anywhere in Sydney to deliver pies without run-ins with the punker gangs, known as carboys. Carboys are your typical muscle-car bullies. When they aren't harassing people on foot or in compact cars, they can be seen scavenging parts from wrecks and abandoned cars. Not exactly the friendliest of people.

After a couple of run-ins with the carboys, Crabs decides taking his girlfriend, Carmen, on a date to the drive-in is a good idea, even though society is crumbling around him. In order to impress his runaway girlfriend, Crabs steals his brother's '56 Chevy. Being typical hormonally-driven teens, the two kids ditch paying attention to the flick and move straight into bumping uglies in the back seat. Wrong move. Just as things started getting heavy, both back tires are stolen, rendering the Chevy incapable of movement. Must be the carboys again, right? Wrong, it looks like the cops are trying to get a piece of the scavenging action too, but not for the same reasons. When Crabs wakes up in the morning, he discovers that he's not the only one stuck at the drive-in. There are close to 200 youngsters living in the theater parking lot like it was some kind of permanent Phish lot, and none of them seem to want to escape. Crabs doesn't get it, and keeps up living a healthy lifestyle despite the punk rock parking lot party that is a constant around him. At this point everybody, including Carmen, has come to except that watching movies and eating junk food is their future, no matter how concentration-like there new life is. Crabs ain't going out like that though, and will do whatever it takes to get out, even kill.

Despite his clean living, I felt the Crabs must have been one of the biggest, fucking idiot I've seen in a movie. Despite being told time-and-time again he wasn't going anywhere, he didn't get it, and I don't think it was just blind determination. I really think his IQ was somewhere in the lower, yet functional, double-digits. No matter how many times he was told, even by his girlfriend, to "relax and have fun, you're not going anywhere" he refused. I think he genuinely believed if he had tires and gas, the drive-in prison actually had an open door policy. Besides, why would he ever want to leave? Society is crumbling on the outside, and he can live of life of junk food, drugs, and drive-in movies. This doesn't sound too bad to me. It actually sounds like the perfect way to spend my time as society goes apocalyptic. Granted, I don't think I could ever go all white power when the Asians are all bussed in, like everybody else did, even the black prisoners(?), but these things happen. That's why it's best to stay out of politics when shit hits the fan.

My first Aussie flick, after seeing Not Quite Hollywood, was completely worth the time I took away from Facebook and the boobtube. I had everything I expected(punks, car chases, sexytime and explosions) and even a little more I didn't expect(racism and heroic idiocy). This is definitely one of those movies I'm going to pass off to friends who have seen the documentary, and I'll probably even watch it with them.

Are You Ready For Some Mum-Ra?

As you can tell from my multiple postings on the subject, I have been eagerly awaiting the release of the new Thundercats series. So when I gleened the second trailer release in the wee hours of the morning, I knew I would have to repost it for those who don't follow Beyond Hollywood as I do(there can't be that many of you). I didn't recall seeing much Mum-Ra in the first trailer release, and that left me feeling kind of empty. With this second trailer, we get a better idea of the storyline and plenty of Mum-Ra and his minions. My faith is restored!

Black Rain(1989) Friday at Midnight in Williamsburg

I think Spectacle Theater is throwing a curveball this Friday Night. After months of regularly scheduled "Midnite" movies on Friday and Saturday nights, Spectacle is doing something quite a bit different tomorrow. Rather than the cinematic trash that is the reason for this blogs existence being a Friday night standard, they decided to kick it up a notch with some art and high drama. These aren't concepts I am a stranger to, but after covering the majority of the Yakuza film series and all the Miike shit a couple of weeks ago, Japanese drama isn't really high on my list this week, but it doesn't mean everybody else won't enjoy seeing Black Rain(1989) tomorrow night.

IMDB says -"Mr and Mrs Shizuma, and their niece Yasuko, make their way through the ruins of Hiroshima, just after the atomic bomb has dropped. Five years later, Yasuko is living with her aunt and uncle, and her senile grandmother, in a village containing many of the bomb survivors. Yasuko does not appear to be affected by the bomb, but the Shizuma's are worried about her marriage prospects, as she could succumb to radiation sickness at any time."

Black Rain gets 8.1 out of 10 stars on IMDB, which is pretty impressive, so I don't think this is going to be a bad way to spend Friday Night. I just prefer the company of biker zombies over a really deep film to end a long week of non-work.

Friday, April 1st at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

More Yakuza: International Premiere of Ryuji(1983) Friday at 7:30 PM

50% of all ticket sales will go to Japan Society's Earthquake Relief Fund.

We have even more Yakuza action continuing throughout the weekend at the Japan Society. This time with the First International release of the drama Ryuji(1983).

The Japan Society says - "Ryuji is more than just a film, it is the final testament of a dying man, a young stage actor eager to find an interesting role on the big screen. His name is Shoji Kaneko. He likes writing and yakuza cinema, and chooses to write the story himself--the portrait of a young yakuza who (following the usual conceit) wants to leave the underworld, for the sake and love of his wife and daughter, after a long stint in jail. A fragile film, not unlike the performance of the lead actor/writer, who succumbed to cancer one week after the film's release. Ryuji seems to be haunted by his disappearance, as if anticipating the mourning of its own central figure. With a realism reminiscent of the Actors Studio's famed method (the actor joined a real gang to capture the essence of the role and the world in which the yakuza live), the drama comes to life with the support of a formidable cast (notably, the actor's real-life daughter). An anti-noir film with unusual sheen and clarity, Ryuji is touched with breathtaking moments of loveliness and hints of peace, the blend of moral brinksmanship, and restrained visuals. The pleasures of the film reside in the mischievous yet tolerant recognition that behind brutality lies human frailty, in its infinite range. The manner of its delivery is so disarmingly graceful--lacking neither emotional impact nor aesthetic punch--that you can almost feel the blood of the film flow."

Friday, March 18th 7:30 PM @ Japan Society, 333 East 47th Street, at 47th Street and First Avenue

Holy Shit! Trailer for the Cartoon Networks Thundercats reboot

Imagine my fuckin' surprise this morning when I was skimming through my morning news(Twitch)only to find that a couple days back, The Cartoon Network aired a trailer for the Thundercats Reboot, Produced by Studio 4°C, a Japanese animation house. I can't find any information about when the world is going to be able to catch the anime-inspired re-imagining of one of Generation X's greatest cartoon memories, But you can be sure this guy is going to be glued to the couch.