Sunnyside(1979)

Directed by Timothy Galfas(Bogard(1974), Lord of the Ring(1978))

Starring Joey Travolta( Hollywood Vice Squad(1986), Amazon Women on the Moon(1987)), Stacey Pickren( The Border(1982), Flashdance(1983)) and Andrew Rubin( Police Academy(1984))



Sunnyside, Queens is one of the few NYC neighborhoods, outside of Brooklyn, I would probably live in. That is, of course, if I wasn't financially strapped to Bushwick for FSM knows how long. Unlike most of the fauxhemian Brooklyn snobs, like myself, who make up a great portion of the outlander population flooding northern BK, I have no qualms with living outside of the cool zone. My girl's sister lives there, so I have a plenty of time to explore the nabe on my own. It has so many more amenities than Bushwick for one, the melting pot is so large that the local cuisine is so much more diversified than any hood in Hipsterville. Cheaper rents, safety, yada-yada...I could probably go on for quite some time. Truth be told, if I'm not staying in Bushwick or moving out to the Northwest in the next year, I'll probably end up in Sunnyside.

Sunnyside(1979) also happens to be the name, as well as the setting, of the 70's street gang movie I watched this morning, starring one Joey Stallone. Stallone plays Nicky, leader of the Nightcrawlers, one of three of the biggest gangs in Sunnyside. Unlike the other gangs, Nick's boys are more community organizers than career criminal. Sure they involve themselves in illegal activity, but nobody seems to get hurt but rival gangs. Nick happens to get fed up with the carny folk coming into his hood and ripping off the community so he plans on robbing them blind to teach a lesson. Unfortunately, the Nightcrawlers can't do it on their own, so they arrange a summit with the 2 other rival gangs to discuss a large group activity. Three rival gangs working together, what can possibly go wrong? Well, Nicky's bright idea ends up killing three, two being leadership of an opposing gang, all thanks to our friendly neighborhood, coked-out sociopath, Eddie Reaper. Now that Sunnyside is down a street gang, Reaper wants to make sure he can eliminate all the competition, especially the Nightcrawlers.

New York City is probably my favorite setting for genre films from 70's, bar none. There is just something about the grittiness of both the backdrop and the characters that you will find in no other city setting during this era of American film. I know it's been said time and time again, but NYC circa 70's is just a backdrop, it's actually a character. I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have gotten the same kick out of Sunnyside if it was filmed in LA or Detroit. There is just something about the Best City in the World that automatically adds points to any film I watch, an example being Joe's Apartment(pure garbage).

It was also nice to see that the movie was actually filmed on location in Sunnyside and not in Jersey City or Brooklyn(see Bronx Warrior). There is just something about seeing that Greenpoint Avenue sign that got me excited. Being a 32 year old movie, the street signs were the most recognizable things. If I ever watch it again, I will be sure that it's with someone who actually grew up in the area so I can get a better idea of the filming locations.

As I said before, I probably wouldn't have liked this film as much if NYC wasn't the setting. It wasn't a bad movie per se, but you can tell that this was a start out role for most of the actors. It was also a bit too serious for my taste. I like my street gang movies to be quite a bit less believable, Like the Warriors or Class of 1984. The trashier and more ridiculous the better.

For those of you who love 70's films set in NYC, or are actually born and raised in the Big Apple, this is something you might want to check out. For those of you who know nothing of the gritty character of 70's New York, you're probably not going to enjoy it as much.

Cheerleaders Beach Party(1978)

Directed by Alex E. Goitein (Cherry Hill High(1977), Fringe Benefits(1974))

Starring Lynn Hastings (Cherry Hill High), Jamie Jensen (Earthbound(1981)-Production Secretary) and Rick Gitlin (Squeeze Play(1979), Hotshot(1978))



What's a small, University's Cheering Squad to do when the school's top football players are planning on switching to an opposing college in the next semester? According to Cheerleaders Beach Party(1978), the best plan of action is to follow the boys to their summer retreat and screw up there plans. Better yet, just "screw" their plans, literally.

And that's really all there is to this film as far as a plot is concerned. Throw in a couple of boob shots, bad acting, and jokes written by a 5th grader and you have Cheerleaders Beach Party. When I say bad acting I don't mean the standards which a great deal of the cheesy movies I write about follow. I'm talking You-Will-Never-Work-In-This-Town-Again level of acting skills, or lack there of. I'm serious. If you check out the IMDB entry you'll see that many of the actors only ever acted in this film and the director's previous cinematic masterpiece Cherry Hill. If this is his sophomore film I'm kind of scared to watch Cherry Hill for fear I might never want to watch a movie again, but I'll probably do it anyway.

Beach Party might have been extremely difficult to watch, but the film did have a couple of good qualities besides top naked girls every 10 or 15 minutes, which wasn't even that gratifying. Topless shots in this movie make films like Porky's and Meatballs look like hardcore pornography. Get what I'm saying?

I would have to say the best part of this movie were a couple of one-liners. Even though they were written to appeal to the comedic sensibility of an 11 year old, there were a couple of lines that made the eternal child in me chuckle just a bit.

"As much fun as an autopsy." - This one didn't make me chuckle over the humor but more over the sheer stupidity of the line.

"Humpum for wumpum" - Best line of the entire film. Seriously it is.

There were a few more, but I really didn't have the enough of a will to actually write them down, so two is all you get. That's all, folks. I could probably write a couple more paragraphs about such inane topics as "Why are they wearing cheering uniforms all the time" or " how does a person have sex without removing the pants" but Beach Party is not even worth the number of words I've already put into it. it was that much of a piece of shit. Do I regret watching it? Not really. Will you regret it if after reading this review? Probably. Don't say I didn't warn you.

This shitbox doesn't even have an available trailer. Boo Hoo!!!

The Death Wheelers(1973)

Directed by Don Sharp (The Brides of Fu Manchu(1966), Curse of the Fly(1965), Bear Island(1979))

Starring Nicky Hensen (Old Drac(1975), Witchfinder General(1968)) and Ann Michelle(Virgin Witch(1972), Young Lady Chatterley(1977))







I have been praising the Midnite selections over at Williamsburg's Spectacle Theater for months now. Who ever is doing the programming over there obviously knows what the fuck is up, and there is usually something good going on at least once a week for fans of cult trash. Even though budget and social restrictions typically prevent me from going, there have several movies on their roster that I had never heard of but made it a point to seek out. The Death Wheelers(1973) was one of these films I knew I had to see even if I couldn't make the screening. Biker Gangs, Devil Worship and the Living Dead all rolled into one little British package. What more could a man want?

After months of having a copy, I was finally able to sit down and watch it with friends and loved ones. Movies like this I like sharing with the Girlfriend. It also helped that we had a guest and there is currently nothing available on primetime for the next couple of weeks, so the evening's entertainment totally ended up in my favor.

And it was completely worth it.

Granted, it didn't go exactly as described. There was a biker gang, The Living Dead, and they aren't the friendliest bunch. Antisocial is a bit tame of a word to describe their actions. The Devil Worship wasn't really "worship" per se. It was more of a "Deal with the Devil", or a "Deal with the Toad Demon". That's right, I said Toad Demon. In fact, in Death Wheelers toads are the reason for the season. How very odd, but I know I've seen stranger storylines in movies from the 70's.

Then we get to The Living Dead. To most people, "living dead" refers to mindless, rotting husks of humanity who sustain themselves on the brains of the living. Not so much here. To be "living dead" in the Death Wheelers pretty means having all the benefits of higher undead, like a vampire, but without many of the drawbacks (I think there is something bad with crucifixes). To become the "living dead" all one must do is want to die to live. Sounds confusing, doesn't it? Well I can't give everything away.

I had fun watching this film, although there were a couple lowpoints. Namely, the lack of gore. I'm assuming it had more to do with British censors than artistic direction, but I could have used more blood and guts. It also felt slow at parts, which could have been considered a good set-up for all the road action, which I thought was nicely filmed and proper. I was also a huge fan of the music, from the cheesy little acoustic numbers to the psych/mod/soul rock that made up most of the background even if it was pretty repetitive.

If you like Hammer Horror with a higher budget and JD/biker movies, you would probably get a kick out of the Death Wheelers. Even if you don't, but are still a horror and action fan, it's still worth at least one watch.

Bilitis(1977)

Directed by David Hamilton (Laura, les ombres de l'été(1979), Un été à Saint-Tropez(1983), Premiers désirs(1984))

Starring Patti D'Arbanville (Flesh(1968), Real Genius(1985)) and Bernard Giraudeau (Revolver(1973), The Gypsy(1975))

Coming of Age film or softcore pornography? To me, there is a definitive line, if not several levels separating the two genres. Coming Of Age films tackle topics of entering early adulthood. Topics like first kiss, first love, breaking out of ones shell, and all that other being a teenager happy horseshit are the standard subject matter. You might see the occasional booby shot or bathroom shower scene, but the nudity and sexual innuendo are typically pretty tame. Coming of Age movies are more driven by character development.

Softcore films, on the other hand, are less about the characters and more about the display of sexuality. Sure, many of these European films were character and/or story driven, but they had to be because hardcore sex on film wasn't yet socially acceptable throughout Europe(except possibly Sweden). I've also found that many of the 70's softies were directed and filmed with artistic vision. Focusing less on the sheer rawness of sexuality and more on the beauty of the female creature.

Strangely, to some, the two genres can be one in the same. Mixing both the drama of being a teenager and overdone sexuality, Bilitis(1977) is proof of this. Bilitis is the story of a young schoolgirl who has never known the kiss of a boy, but frequently fools around with her female classmate. In fact, it seems as if the whole private school she attends does. Not only do they all go on group skinny-dipping adventures, but they have teacher monitoring their activity. Kinda creepy and weird. Anyhoo, it's the end of the school year and Bili is spending her summer with a an unknown guardian who happens to be a family friend I'm guessing. Bili's guardian happens to be married to a scumbag, who happens to forcibly take his wife whenever he's not cheating on her. Bili, being the sensitive type, develops a deep hatred for the man, at the same time lusting after her much older "guardian". Things start to get a bit strange when scumbag takes a trip with his mistress, Leaving Bilitis a chance to act on her growing impulses.

I would like to pass the creepiness that is Bilitis off as just a "French" thing and me being 'Merican I couldn't possibly understand, but it's not that at all. David Hamilton, the director, although sought out as a visionary photographer, is well known for being quite a bit of a creep. If you check out the links at the top, you'll see what I mean. He may be an artist, but all his films have to do with teenagers and sex, and not like Porky's or American Pie. He really has a thing for schoolgirls between the ages of 14 and 16, who happen to have the hormonal drives of a sexual predator. I don't care how innovative the guy was by smearing vaseline on a camera lens, He obviously had some issues with attraction that aren't necessarily natural by modern standards, especially mine.

I'll admit that the photography was spot on and artistically pleasing as it was intended, although I wouldn't ever describe it as "visionary" or "cutting edge". The two lead actresses were also very nice on the eyes, and thankfully of age as actresses, so I was not offended by watching the two of them nakedly embrace and kiss each other. I am a straight man, after all. Other than a couple of beautiful filmed vanilla sex scenes and the creepiness of the direction, Bilitis had very little else to offer besides boredom, and lots of it. I won't be watching this again, or probably any other Hamilton production for that matter. Just plain creepy!!!!

Eyeball (1975) aka Gatti rossi in un labirinto di vetro

Directed by Umberto Lenzi(Cannibal Ferox(1981), Seven Blood-Stained Orchids(1973), Napoli Violenta(1976))

Starring Martine Brochard(Milano trema - la polizia vuole giustizia(1973), Riot in a Women's Prison(1974)), John Richardson(Torso(1973), One Million Years BC(1966)), and Ines Pellegrini(Salò(1975), Escape from Women's Prison(1978))




For those of us fans of the Giallo, there are certain elements that we expect in the pre-slasher italian classics, no matter whether the movie is good or bad. In fact, those of us that are fans of the Giallo genre usually don't care whether it's good or not, we will typically watch it regardless. While there are many gialli that are considered by cinematic and horror classics, for every good one you can count are there being at least three bad. But even if the film is considered a masterpiece by fans of the genre, there are still going to be many out there who consider it pure garbage. So goes the plight of the genre-film nerd, as is the rule for all of nerdom.

Eyeball(1975) is not a giallo I would consider a genre masterpiece. In fact, if you read through the comments section of IMDB, you'll find that many people don't consider it as such. As a giallo fan, I don't really give two fucks what people had to say about it, I enjoyed watching it. It had everything I expect out of the giallo genre, and then some.

Premise....A busload of "American" tourists land in Madrid for a group tour. Little do they know is that there is a killer among them. Almost upon arrival, buddies start stacking up wherever the bus lands, turning everybody into a supsect. Not only are the murders quick and brutal, but the victims are all found with there left eye removed in the most hideous fashion.

As with most gialli, most of the main characters are considered suspects at one point or another. Obviously. It is of course, a step above your typical murder mystery, but it is still a "whodunit". Unlike the stereotypical black leather gloves and trenchcoat, our killer wears red gloves with a red plastic raincoat, and not a slicker either. I'm talking about the throwaway types that are given to bus ride tourists in NYC when the weather is shitty. Such a cheap and gawdy disguise really adds to the comedic element of the movie, even if it wasn't the directors intention. But this is a Lenzi film, and those of us familiar with his works also know this type of unplanned comedy appears often. I also found the attempt to make the actual murders seem believable also added to the unintentional comedy. I've seen off-off Broadway scenes that have more believable murder scenes. The gore was there, but the speed at which the dagger was coming toward the victim could have been escaped by a person in a wheelchair.

As with many giallo's, some of the old standards were present. We got a fairly healthy dose of lesbianism, jazzy music, and even a discotheque scene. I don't know what it was that made Italian directors in the 70's obsessed with girl-on-girl action, but it's a pretty prevalent theme... and it sell movies to a mostly male audience. I just answered my own question.

Despite Eyeball not being one of the best of the genre, I really enjoyed the film. Lenzi might not be the best writer, but he definitely has mad skills with the camera, as well as knowing how to film in some excellent locations. Not only did Eyeball provide me with 90 minutes of non-stop thrills and laughs, but it also made me add Madrid to my destination map of places I'm going to eventually see in Europe if I'm ever able to save up money to do so.

They Call Her One Eye and Torso Make the Midnite Rounds This Weekend in Brooklyn

It's another Grindhouse three-day weekend at Spectacle this week. Rather than write separate entries for each feature screening at Brooklyn's best theater, Spectacle, I decided to throw all three films in one big blog entry. Not only does it make it easier for all of you with interest in the theater itself, it makes it easier for me because I don't have to keep up the "now showing" entries at Spectacle for the rest of the weekend, which is something I've been slipping with lately.

The Midnite Madness kicks off tonight with the Italo Post-Apocalyptic trash bag, Exterminators of the Year 3000(1983)



IMDB says - "The year 3000, after a nuclear war turned the earth into a desert. A group of survivors in a cave runs out of water and desperately needs new supply. The last guy they sent out didn't return. His 10 years old son Timmy wants to join the next team. They know where they'll find a well, but the problem it the way there, which is controlled by a savage gang of motorcyclists under the bloodthirsty Crazy Bull. A lonesome stranger who Timmy meets on the way may help. "

Now this is the only movie of the three I have not seen, but since it's an Italian genre movie AND Post-Apoc I feel that no matter what the ratings are on IMDB (4.5 out of 10)it's still going to be awesome. I'm not at all familiar with the director, Giuliano Carnimeo, but going over his IMDB entry I see he was actually a pretty prolific director and directed movies I've heard of like The Case of The Bloody Iris(1972). Going to see this tonight can only be a great start to the weekend.

I have not only seen tomorrow's slice-of-awesome They Call Her One Eye(1974) but I've actually written a review for it(here). Out of all the rape-victim-goes-revenge films I've watched over the last few months, this is by far my favorite, and it has nothing to do with the XXX shots. You can always count on Swedish filmmakers of the 70's to go above and beyond the call of duty when making a proper revenge flick.



Spectacle says - "Swedish sexploitation star, Christina Lindberg, stars in this brutal rape-revenge classic directed by Bo Arne Vibenius (who had previously worked with Ingmar Bergman as an assistant director on Persona and unit director on Hour of the Wolf). After being abducted on her way to school one morning, Frigga/Madeleine is held hostage by a scumbag who gets her hooked on heroin and prostitutes her ass to various clients. She eventually ventures out to do some firearm and martial arts training so she can avenge all the sleazy Swedes who raped her and took out one of her eyes. The ultra-ultra slo-mo sequences of Frigga/Madeleine blasting away her prey is both chilling and hilarious.

The film has been referenced by both Abel Ferrara in Ms. 45 and by Quentin Tarantino in Kill Bill Vol. 1. Lindberg has gone on to make numerous eurosleaze flicks as well as become a prominent journalist in Sweden."

And last but not least we have the giallo Torso(1973), a film I first became familiar with after seeing the poster numerous times when I practically used to pay rent at Brooklyn's infamous metal bar, Duff's. I tried to make it a goal to watch every single movie Jimmy had posters for. As far as I know, I got pretty far. Again, this is one of those movies I am very familiar with and have reviewed(here).



Spectacle says - "One Day She Met A Man Who Loved Beautiful Women...

BUT NOT ALL IN ONE PIECE!

A series of sex murders shock a college campus, and four beautiful young girlfriends head for the safety of an isolated country villa. But as they succumb to their own erotic desires, their weekend of pleasure becomes a vacation to dismember at the hands - and blade - of the lecherous maniac.

Starring Suzy Kendall (THE BIRD WITH THE CRYSTAL PLUMAGE) and Tina Aumont (SALON KITTY), this Euro Horror chiller was originally released in America with much of its controversial violence removed by censors.

Presented in its Uncensored English Version."

Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Poliziotteschi Classics Tomorrow Evening at Spectacle

Looks like Spectacle Theater is going balls out this weekend with the Italian genre cinema. Poliziotteschi Saturday and Spaghetti Western Sunday along with their Midnite grindhouse spectaculars. I'll tell you this...if I were single, I would probably be there all weekend, especially for the Poliziotteschi films. I understand some of you readers might not be as familiar with this high action Italian genre I am. Just in case, here's a brief definition lifted from the pages of CG, "Poliziotteschi is a sub-genre of crime and action film that emerged in Italy in the late 1960s and became popular in the 1970s. Poliziotteschi films are also known as poliziottesco, Italo-crime, Euro-crime or simply Italian crime films."

Got it? I that wasn't enough think about this: a whole genre of film influenced by crime classics like Dirty Harry, but being that they are produced in Italy, are extremely over the top like a great deal of Italian genre cinema from the 70's. Lot's of revenge, mob hits, shoot outs, car chases and explosions. Everything a guy could ever want in a movie.



No Way Out(1973) aka Tony Arzenta at 7:30 PM.

IMDB says - "Duccio Tessari's superb Italian crime film stars Alain Delon as hit man Tony Arzenta who decides that it's time to retire from the game. After a brutal attack on his family he sets out for revenge. Also stars genre regulars Richard Conte, Anton Diffring, Marc Porel & Erika Blanc with a great soundtrack by Gianni Ferrio."

Spectacle says - "In this stylish and moody revenge-driven bloodbath, an icy and lethal hit man who wants to quit the game but the Mob doesn’t want to let him go."



and at 9:30 PM High Crime(1973)aka La polizia incrimina la legge assolve starring the superbly wonderful Franco Nero.

IMDB says - "f you have never seen an Italian crime movie, this is a great place to start. unlike many other films of this type, it actually works on an emotional level as well as being very entertaining, simular to the films of Scorsese. it's a very violent film, but none of the violence is gratuitous. lots of stylish slow motion shootings, car explosions, and people run over by various moter vehicles, and the excellent musical score by Guido and Maurizio De Angelis captures the emotion of these scenes perfectly. the cast is also very good, especialy Italian Star Franco Nero. highly recommended."

Spectacle says - "A fast paced, violent, gritty, and innovative crime thriller about a tough cop going hard after an international drug ring. One of the best crime thrillers ever made, this film is relentless and brutal, and filled with a constantly shifting storyline, and a mesmerizing score by Guido De Angelis & Maurizio De Angelis."

Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

The Blood Spattered Bride(1972) is Friday's Midnite Specracular...

...at Spectacle and it is yet another movie I know absolutely nothing about. Based on the trailer, I would say it has something to do with vampires, and seeing that it's a Spanish horror from the 70's, I'm going to guess that your going to see a fair amount of skin in this one. It's not like the kids over at Spectacle are ever going to let the Midnite crowd down. If that doesn't give you enough reasons to check it out, head on over to the IMDB entry to see what others have to say.

IMDB says - "A young husband's sexual fantasies frighten his new wife and cause her to seek advice from Carmilla, a descendent of Mircalla de Karnstein. Carmilla seduces the young bride and forces her to commit gory acts of mutilation."

Hmmmm....for some reason I feel like I've heard this story before. Could it be because their are several European productions, mostly from Spain, about the story of a vampiress named Camilla? I could be wrong(I'm not)but it looks like a popular subject matter in Spanish exploitation horror.

Fun Facts(or shall I say fact, because their is ony one on IMDB.....The Anchor Bay release of the film is in English, also dubbed in English to clean up the Spanish accents of the actors attempting English throughout. It is not likely that a Spanish language version of this film exists.

Friday, July 1st at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

The Man From Hong Kong(1975) In Brooklyn Tomorrow Night

The Man From Hong Kong(1975)was one of the Aussie first movies I sought out when I first became interested in the Ozploitation genre. If I remember correctly, It was the trailer for Not Quite Hollywood that sparked my interest even though it would take me a couple years to see the documentary. I figured it was a good starter movie to immerse myself into the genre, since I was already a seasoned professional with Kung-Fu love. I looked at it as a winning situation in screening. How bad can a movie be starring Jimmy Wang Yu, former Shawscope star and international dickhead extraordinaire? The answer was NO WAY IN HELL could it ever be considered anything but a classic to those of us who are fans of genre cinema. Not only are the martial arts scenes primo, which was my initial draw, but the action was non-fucking-stop and I couldn't keep my eyes off the damn screen. Fights, car chases, and explosions up the wazoo.....The Man From Hong Kong met every expectation I had and then some. I find it to be one of those action movies that I have based all others on since I first watched it a couple years back.

And now you New Yorkers who have never seen it can experience the same enjoyment I have, because it's screening at Spectacle Theater tomorrow at Midnite.

IMDB says - "It's 1975. A time of funky pants. Muscle cars. Ridiculous sideburns. Porn-star moustaches. Bruce Lee still rules the world of action movies (despite being dead), and I haven't even been BORN yet.

Sydney. Jack Wilton (The Laze) is a bad-ass crime lord with a penchant for cravats, orange velvet sofas and all things Oriental. Under the cover of his legitimate import/export business, he runs an international drug-smuggling outfit with connections in Hong Kong. Two federal narcotics cops, Grosse (Hugh Keays-Byrne, Toecutter from Mad Max) and Taylor (Roger Ward, Fifi from - er - Mad Max) manage to catch Win Chan (Sammo Hung), a member of this Hong Kong connection, following a well-staged--yet amusingly pointless--fight sequence atop Uluru (sorry, Ayers Rock). Chan is to be extradited, as soon as he testifies against Wilton. But the Aussie cops hadn't counted on the extradition officer being a certain Inspector Fang Sing-Ling (Jimmy Wang Yu), of Hong Kong Special Branch ("What's so special about Special Branch?" you ask? Watch the movie and find out!). Fang is a loose cannon, to say the least, and is intent on bringing down Wilton's entire operation himself, no matter how much of Sydney he has to destroy in the process."

Did you know (thanks to IMDB)....According to the DVD Audio Commentary and the documentary Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitation! (2008), the fight scene atop of the elevator between Wang Yu and Brian Trenchard-Smith allegedly involved real fisticuffs, the punches thrown at the latter allegedly being real punches. Reportedly, the two had a strained relationship during the shoot. As Wang Yu is credited as a co-director in some prints, as such, this movie represents an instance where a film's rival two directors have literary fought it out on the set.

Saturday June 18th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Bloodsucking Ozzie-Style with Thirst(1979)

Directed by Rod Hardy (Nick Fury: Agent of Shield-TV movie, lots of Television)

Produced by Antony I. Ginnane(Harlequin,Patrick,Treasure of the Yankee Zephyr)

Starring Chantal Contourri(Barry McKenzie Holds His Own,Alvin Rides Again, and Again! And Again! And Again!), Max Phipps(The Cars That Eat People,The Road Warrior,Stage Fright)and Henry Silva(The Italian Connection,Almost Human,Kidnap)



After seeing Not Quite Hollywood(review here) a couple months back, I decided it would be in my best interest to watch as many "ozploitation" films as I could get my grubby little hands on. So far, the quest has been pretty successful. I could probably do better if I weren't A)so lazy, and B)put my other cinematic interests aside for a long while. Since I don't see myself going through a severe personality change anytime soon, it's just going to have to remain this way. So my Path to Oz is also going to end up being the Path of Least Effort, because that's how we do...Man!

Like many attached men in the world, I occasionally like to share my movie watching experiences with the one I love. Since Mary doesn't share the same love for action/adventure that I do, I wanted to pick a film she would like. Fact: Chicks like vampires. There is just something about pale skin and eternal suffering on earth that really pulls at the female heartstrings. My girlfriend is no exception. This is a girl who secretly watched the first two Twilight movies in secret and refused to tell me for fear of ridicule. So getting her to watch a vampire movie takes no twisting of the arm. So this made Thirst(1979) pretty easy choice for us. Not only do I get to fill my ozploitation quota, but I get to enjoy it with my favorite person.

Kate is the last living blood relative of the infamous Lady Bathory. Being a modern women, this means very little to her, if anything at all. Why would it? Kate isn't exactly the type of women that screams blood-hungry mass murderer. Looking at her, you're more prone to think "holidays in Paris" rather than "bathing in the blood of virgins". Unfortunately, not everybody thinks that. As it turns out, there are people in the world that care about Kate's lineage more than she wants to know, and this is why Kate gets kidnapped. It turns out that Lady Bathory was responsible for the founding of a cult of blood suckers, who like to think of themselves as a "brotherhood". This "Brotherhood" has been pulling strings behind the scenes for centuries, as you would expect any secret society to do, and as vampires have moved beyond attacking villagers in the dead of night. The 70's vampire has ditched the hunter/gatherer lifestyle and followed in humanities path with a more agrarian/industrial lifestyle. Not only are humans, known affectionately as "blood cows" farmed for there life-sustaining fluids on premise, but the Brotherhood has also perfected the art of mass production for market gain. There is even a filtering process not unlike pasteurization.

It doesn't take Kate long to figure out what's going on, and she's not having it. I mean, really, what kind of person would want to be given eternal life and treated like a god? After an escape attempt or two, Kate is put through a rigorous "conditioning" to help her see the brighter side of her captor's lifestyle. Will she finally succumb and take her place amongst the blood-sucking elite?

If you read the IMDB reviews of Thirst, you'll see a good amount of "not your typical vampire movie" type of commentary. My question to them is, what is typical? If a person's idea of typical is Bram Stoker's Dracula, then I would have to agree. This is not your typical vampire flick, but how many of the memorable vampire films are? Lost Boys, From Dusk Till Dawn, The Hunger..to me these are the most memorable vampire films, and they have nothing to do with the regurgitated-many-times-over story of the Count. Unless a person has watched nothing but Universal Horror knock-offs their entire life, I have a hard time following the idea of a "typical vampire flick"

Thirst was memorable and different, but I'm not going to hold it to the highest regards like I do the three films previously mentioned. Yes, it's a different take on the vampire mythology, but is the concept of farming humans for sustenance really that original? Maybe if you've never seen a sci-fi or dystopian movie in your life, but for those of us that have, the concept is nothing new. Thirst was also quite the slow burn, or as some reviewers like to say, moody and atmospheric. If you just pulled a 10 hour work day, this is probably not the movie to sit down and relax with, unless you plan on falling asleep to it. It doesn't take long to figure out what's going on, but it feels like forever before you feel like something is actually happening. When shit does go down, pay attention. Especially when it concerns Henry Silva and a helicopter.

I would recommend Thirst to those fans of horror who have more of an affinity of The Shining than those who have seen all the Saw films. Thirst is the kind of movie you sit down with a loved one over a bottle of wine to watch, maybe two couples. For those of you party screeners, Thirst is going to be a bad choice unless you want to clear out a room oir arranging a slumber party. It's just not that type of movie.

A Free Wheelin' Feelin' with Supervan(1977)

Directed by Lamar Card(Disco Fever,The Swinging Barmaids,The Clones)

Written by John Arnoldy(Cycle Vixens,Disco Fever) and Robert Easter(The Toolbox Murders,Sworn to Justice)

Starring Mark Schneider(Burnout),Katie Saylor(Invasion of the Bee Girls,Dirty O'Neil,The Swinging Barmaids) and Morgan Woodward(Cool Hand Luke)

Since I have written incessantly about my love for the 70's drive-in spectaculars and how it pertains to my day-to-day, I decided to take the first paragraph to say something different. You may have noticed the written format of this entry is different than previous review entries. I have decided to take the first section of each review I write to highlight those that were most important in the making of each film. I do this not only to give you, the audience, the reference points, but to also highlight each of the artists other works related to the types of cinema both you and I enjoy. Frequently I find films to watch based upon the IMDB of another film I enjoyed. Instead of taking the time to look it up yourself (which you should still do) you can just link up from the entry. Let's make it easier for all the parties involved...

It was only a matter of time before I got a hold of the van fetish/culture classic Supervan(1977). Despite the fact I have never possessed a license in my life, there is just something about automobile related drive-in cinema that makes my day, especially when it's van related. Up until this day The Van was one of my favorite 70's car comedies, and then Supervan drove through my living room. I know there has to be van flicks I'm missing. If you know of any, leave a comment.

Clint is a free spirit, or rather I should say a freewheelin' spirit. Even though he has close to zero back story, it only takes seconds to realize that he can't be held down by constraints of mature society or, um, his bad ass mechanic father. With nothing but a van and a CB radio, Clint is off to Kansas for the 2nd Annual Bicentennial Van Freakout of 1976 (did I say that right?). Not far along the way he rescues Karen from a rather rapey situation involving some gnarly bikers, but not without a loss..his prized van the Sea Witch. How and the hell can Clint go the the Freakout and win $5,000 without a vehicle to do it in? Thankfully Clint and Karen are able to make a pitstop at the lab of Bob Boz, who happens to be something of a mad scientist. Bob works for Karen's Rich father T.B Trenton, and just happened to milk a shitload of money out of him to create the van of the future, the solar-powered Vandora. Unbeknown to Mr. Trenton, Boz is lending the Kit of Rolling Breadboxes to Clint so he can win the competition. When the rich windbag finds out he is not too happy, especially when he find out that our hero has been doing the deed with his estranged daughter.

After seeing the trailer, I expected Supervan to be a less funny and a little more sci-fi than my previous experience with van-culture films, The Van. What I ended up getting out of it was far more than I foresaw, yet still equally as cheesy. The humor, as well as the script, in Supervan was less juvenile and more coherent the that of The Van. I had a harder time following The Van and it's elementary-school editing, but I have stated over and over again that vulgar and sexual humor is my cup of tea, and it had plenty of it. While Supervan was much easier to follow,and the acting was a couple steps ahead, the humor stayed closer to PG-13. Even though the boob shots and fart jokes were minimal, There still is nothing like seeing the real Charles Bukowski fondling the winner of a wet t-shirt contest. That by itself made up for the lack of smut.

Even though the humor was more mature, it still only got a couple of giggles from me. I would like to think it is most likely because of the generation gap, but I'm pretty sure the writers just weren't so suited for the Funny. I look at other films of this era and laugh my ass off, so I know it can't be the time period. I wouldn't call the humor a complete flop, but for those of you out there looking for Animal House you are going to be utterly disappointed. The funniest part of the movie, as far as I'm concerned, are the subjects that are supposed to be slightly serious, like the van itself. Even today, solar-powered vehicles are incapable of reaching speeds of 90 MPH, so the idea of one existing 35 years ago is moronically hilarious to me. Maybe the writers were optimistic enough to believe such a thing was right around the corner. Nowadays we would call that type of thinking naive.

Other enjoyable points to the movie:The Hulk smoking weed with Spock,mustaches,enough bellbottoms to clothe the US Navy and motherfucking vans. Let's not forget my reason for watching this 70's cheese....the vehicles. Like The Van, there was plenty of stock footage of airbrushed exteriors and shag interiors. Seeing these one-ton works of movable art make me yearn for a time before my own coming of age. Before the Aids virus and the height of the drug war. Whatever happened to van culture? I can only assume it so strongly symbolized the carefree "me-me-me" attitude of the 70's that the angry-and-coked-up of the 80's just threw it away. Who Knows....?....

I Spit On Your Grave(1978) Tomorrow at Midnite

Just as I was in the process of taking a hiatus from disturbing rape/revenge grindhouse classics, Spectacle has to go and show one of the classics this Friday for their Midnite Movie. Seeing as it has only been a couple months since I watched the original for the first time, and frankly have seen enough of these types of movies to last me for the next few months, I will not be attending. It doesn't mean you don't have to, though. For most of you exploitation aficionados, I Spit On Your Grave(1978) is old news and is probably something you first watch in second grade as a primer to Cannibal Holocaust. For the rest of you trash newbies, Grave will either disgust you, bore you, or both depending on the level of depth you look into a film. Regardless, if you haven't seen it, tomorrow night is a good time to do so. Besides, no genre-film nerds repertoire is complete without seeing the original at least once.

Spectacle says - "How often does a supposedly trashy, exploitation film, a perfect example of the rape/revenge subgenre, get its biggest defense from a feminist horror film scholar? How often do you get the chance to see Buster Keaton's grand-niece, defiled and humiliated, wreck serious Medieval revenge (‘70s style) on country bumpkin, scum bag tormentors?

Camille Keaton gives an unforgettable performance as Jennifer Hills, a New York City-based writer who journeys up to the woods of Connecticut to focus on her work, only to be attacked by a gang of white trash pigs and left for dead... until she licks her wounds and gets down to business.

Banned in a dozen or more countries and described by critic Roger Ebert as a "a vile bag of garbage without a shred of artistic distinction," Meir Zarchi's notorious and reviled film also received lengthy coverage (and praise) in Carol J. Clover's seminal feminist study, “Men, Women, and Chainsaws”.

It may be one of the most appalling motion pictures ever made, but it is also a grossly misunderstood one."

Friday, June 3rd at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Impossibly Funky Book Tour Brings Black Shampoo to Brooklyn Tomorrow

That's right, fools! Mike White is on tour to promote his book Impossibly Funky and blow your minds with the blaxploitation classic, Black Shampoo(1976). Most of you genre-cinema blogging muthafuckahs know Mike from his expertise in blaxploitation knowledge and better yet Cashiers Du Cinemart. If you haven't the foggiest, not only do I feel sorry for you, but you should head over to Impossibly Funky immediately and check that shit out.

The best part about this event, besides the fact reRun has duck-fat for the popcorn, is the the movie screening is FREE! So all the money you would have spent seeing the film and buying the DVD (because it's so awesome)can be spent on the book.

A word from Leon Chase about Mike White and the Event - " know a lot of you don't know me. And the rest of you probably already get a lot of e-mails from me, asking you to come to a lot of things. But this is something very special that I’m doing for a very old friend, so please take a moment to hear me out…

Did you ever have a movie that, as a teenager, you and your friends got a little obsessed with? The one you watched together waaay too many times, until you knew all the dialogue and memorized every character’s name?

We did. The movie was 1976’s ridiculous blaxploitation classic "Black Shampoo."

The thing is, while the rest of us moved on, my friend Mike White never stopped believing. He went on to start his own obsessive film magazine called “Cashiers du Cinemart", in which he frequently sang the praises of "Black Shampoo". To make a long story short, he not only hunted down the director and most of the cast, but ended up being invited to write the goddamn liner notes for the film's DVD release.

Now, over a decade later, Mike has compiled his film articles into a book called Impossibly Funky. And on July 1st, to promote his book, he’ll be hosting a rare screening of "Black Shampoo" right here on Brooklyn.

Black Shampoo is the story of Mr. Jonathan, a studly, afro’d hairdresser who, among his clientele of lonely rich white ladies, is legendary for much more than just his wash ’n’ rinse. But when a foxy new receptionist named Brenda shows up, even a player like Jonathan has to look twice. And faster than you can say “slow-jam botanical-garden montage,” Jonathan and Brenda are feelin’ the love. Only problem is, Brenda’s got a past: Her jealous white mobster of an ex-boss just doesn’t understand that “there ain’t no slaves no more”, and he wants Brenda back, bad. But when he tries to mess with Jonathan—and his precious hair salon—shit gets real. As the tagline says, “He’s bad. He’s mean. He’s a lovin’ machine. When he’s mad, he’s mean. He’s a killing machine!”

Still not convinced? Check out the original trailer:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VYVyEoBkpUI

WARNING: If you are offended by racial stereotypes (both black and white), horrific gay caricatures, graphic violence, pool table sex, chainsaw fights, curling irons, awkward acting, uncomfortably long shots of close-up tongue kissing, infectious soundtracks soaked in vintage-‘70s wah-wah guitar, Western-style barbecues, and enough gratuitous barely-R interracial sex scenes to get this film censored in most Southern states when it came out (true story), then please DO NOT see this movie.

But if you are a fan of trashy 1970s Blaxploitation movies, and can appreciate all the crude awkward weirdness that comes with them, Black Shampoo is one of the best ones out there. And by “best”, I mean “so hilariously bad it’s good.”

If any of this sounds enticing to you, I invite you to please join Mike and I this Wednesday, June 1st at ReRun Gastropub at 147 Front St. in Dumbo, Brooklyn. Your attendance will go a long way toward supporting his unique (and entirely self-funded) labor of love.

And if that’s not enough incentive, please consider this: The artsy-fartsy types at ReRun are apparently worried that Mike won’t be able to get at least 20 people to show up for a movie like this. Needless to say, we are bound and determined to prove them wrong.

Oh, and did I mention that the whole thing is FREE?

Not only will you get to watch one of the strangest, funkiest movies ever made, but you'll be helping a fanboy's crazy dreams come true.

Won’t you please join us for this once-in-a-lifetime event?

Thanks for your time,
Leon Chase"

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 1 a 6pm ReRun Gastropub Theater(Next to ReBar) 147 Front St. at Jay St. Dumbo, Brooklyn


FREE ADMISSION!

Ages 18 and over only please.

The Visitor(1979) and Then Some on Thursday Evening

It's nice to see Spectacle Theater add an extra night of cult cinema to there already heavy roster. I don't know if WTF!?!? Thursday is going to be a regularly scheduled occurrence, and if it is I'll be the last one complaining. This week's WTF, The Visitor(1984), which I understand is an Italian rip-off of The Omen with sci-fi replacing the satanic. I had never heard of it until this morning, but it sounds like a reason to head into Williamsburg on Thursday night.

Spectacle says - "The holiest of all Holyfuckingshits, The Visitor has the highest JDPM (Jaw Drops Per Minute) ratio of any film of its era, Italian ripoff or not. It's a wonderful mishmash of The Omen and Close Encounters, but that barely hints at the whacked fervor with which director Michael J. Paradise hurls his hastily assembled "all-star" cast (John Huston, Glenn Ford, Shelley Winters, and, yes, Lance Henriksen) into the cinematic void, sh...owering them with what Austin, TX's revival cinema gem The Alamo Drafthouse has called "a blackhearted blowout of interplanetary possession, telekinetic avian assault, exploding basketballs and ecclesiastical laserstorms". Just when you think you've nailed down which direction the film is heading in, it completely shatters your notion of the time-space continuum with enough force to rival a thousand screenings of Zabriskie Point. If you miss out on this one, then you have as much regard for cinema as you do for a discarded toenail clipping. (Bret Berg - Cinefamily)"



After the main feature, feel free to stick around for Brain Bludgeon, which has no IMDB entry, so there isn't much I can tell you about it besides the one paragraph description I have found on a few different websites: "Sewn together from hundreds of forgotten horror films, BRAIN BLUDGEON is a transcendental fusion of trash exposing the willing to everything curious, bizarre, hilarious and awful about no-budget genre films. Hot penny torture, exploding 3d skulls, brutal "de-fetusing", raping zombies, and much more collide in this blissfully IQ-withering amalgamation of exploitation hell."

Thursday, May 19th at 9:30 PM Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Gator Bait(1974)

Hicksploitation isn't really my thing, but sometimes a trailer or poster catches your my eye and I have to do everything in my power to watch said film. Okay...using sometimes might be underplaying it a bit. This kind of thing happens to me all the time. If it wasn't for the catchy poster and DVD/VHS covers of my days trolling through the video stores, I probably ever would have rented half of the trashy garbage that has been burned onto my memory forever. I still do, although there are less trips to the video store and more time spent on social media. I just happen to use Facebook and the blogospere as my introduction to movies I should see. Gator Bait(1984) happened to be one of those movies I was inspired to see due to my time spent gawking at my Facebook wall. If I remember correctly, I might have Mike White(of Impossibly Funky fame) to thank for posting a picture of the poster art. This blog entry is for you, buddy.

Foxy swamp rat Desiree Thibodeau lives deep within the Louisiana Bayou, taking care of her younger sister and mute brother. Understand that the Thibodeau family are existing a couple of steps below the poverty line, as in minimal property ownership and no running water. I wouldn't be surprised if they had never seen a crisp dollar bill in all their life. So poor that Desiree spends her spare time poaching gator to feed her family. Keep in mind this film takes place during a time when hunting alligators had just recently been made illegal, so Desiree has no understanding of the crime that is being committed. For the most part the Local Authority doesn't really care, but it doesn't stop a couple of ignorant, young cops from harassing Desiree(mostly due to their rapey tendencies). After a wild goose chase via boats through the swamps, the young misogynists in uniform are able to catch up with our buck-skinned heroine, but things don't go as planned. Thankfully, Desiree's swampy cunning, and bag of poisonous snakes, are able to get of what could potentially be a deadly situation. Unfortunately, the sheriff's son isn't so good with the responsibility that comes from gun ownership, and instead of taking down his white-trash wonderwomen, he accidently damages his dad's boat and shoots his partner. Unable to take responsibility for his irresponsibility, Billy Boy heads back into town to let his dad, and the Bracken family, know but instead twisting the story around to place the blame on Desiree. These leads to the cops and Bracken's forming of a lynch mob, hellbent on the capture or death of our sweet, swampy princess. Desiree isn't found but her little sister and brother are. Though the original plan was supposed to be something of hostage situation, the younger men of the group can't get passed there rapey tendencies, which unfortunately leads to the violent death of Desiree's little sister. Thankfully her mute brother was able to escape. As with many of these cinematic sketches in souther culture, messin' with kin is the worst thing you can do. When Desiree learns of her sister's untimely demise, the sheriff and his posse better think again about who's bodies are actually going to be used for Gator Bait.

I actually felt that Gator Bait was more tame than I expected. Usually the exploitation movies of this era are chock full of nudity and violence to make up for the lack of a properly written storyline and poor dialogue. With Gator Bait the expected amount of nudity wasn't present, which is only a slight disappointment. The violence was there, but I think the most of the sexuality consisted of a couple boob shots and rape-like behavior. If you are interested in seeing a film that follows by the typical 70's exploitation standards, Gator Bait will possibly disappoint you. Even though the lead actress is a former playmate, she isn't playing an overly sexual character. With that being said, there were other elements to the film that I enjoyed like the filming location. I've lived in Florida before, and know for a fact that the swamp is no person's ideal location for a film shoot, especially for something so low budget. So not only did I feel for the production team, I also felt they did a really good job of capturing the beauty of the natural shooting location. I'm assuming that as expansive as they made they filming location appear, it was probably shot in a 10 acre area, because this is what usually happens. I was also a fan of the soundtrack, at least country music portion of it. I'm assuming the score was original, but I could be wrong due to my unfamiliarity. Shit happens.

If you aren't an exploitation snob, and don't my taking the 90 minutes out to watch a bad movie that's really fun, Gator Bait is good watch. It borders closer to the PG-13 side of exploitation, but it hardly ever get's boring.

The Doll Squad(1973)

Charlie's Angels, like much of the primetime program of the 70's, is a memory for me, but to a degree where I can't remember a single episode. Like the Incredible Hulk and Welcome Back, Kotter, I can remember watching the show religiously, but there is very little I remember about any single episode. I can remember the love I had for these shows, but haven't the foggiest why. Many times I've wanted to obtain all the shows I remember loving on DVD, but if I went and bought everything television program I thought was magical from the 70's, I would never have time for movies and modern programming. This, in part, would make this blog entirely useless, and we can't have that.

Recently I learned that the Father of Old Horseface, Aaron Spelling, was actually accused of being a premise thief by one Ted V. Mikels. You might remember Mikels as being the director of such golden Z-Grade classics as Astrozombies(1968) and The Corpse Grinders(1971). The Auteur of Trash Cinema claimed that Spelling stole idea for Charlie's Angels from a film he wrote and directed back in the early 70's called The Doll Squad(1973). Naturally, after hearing this, I felt this would be a perfect film for me to substitute my desire to one day watch the Charlie's Angel's series in full.

As one who has a pretty in-depth knowledge of exploitation cinema of the 70's, it is really hard for me to believe that The Doll Squad was the soul inspiration for Charlie's Angels. Sixties and Seventies grindhouse/drive-in culture is littered with James Bond/Mod Squad exploitation rip-offs that were less about cool gadgets and more about cashing in on sexual innuendo and showing as much skin as possible(The Girl From S.I.N. being one of the first that comes to mind). I don't feel that Mikel was doing anything original with this idea, besides working his aging "cash cow"(albeit fare from being a cow), Tura Satana, into another craptacular trash film. I have no problem with this either. Any early movie with Tura Satana moonlighting as a burlesque dancer, pasties and all, is always going to be worth the watch. At this point she was in her mid-thirties and really was approaching the end of her "base emotion" sexy.

I am assuming that most of you reading this review know the stipulation behind these types of movies and shows. If you don't, IMDB has a great description, no matter how brief - "An elite army of female assassins...in a race against time and death to save the world from a hideously diabolical mass destruction at the hands of a madman no one had ever seen!"...now doesn't that make you want to run out and buy a copy ASAP?

No?

Despite what can be misconstrued as a lack of enthusiasm for The Doll Squad, there were elements that brought me joy in watching it, besides Tura Satana. For one, the action sequences were steps-above-decent and completely supported by a non-stop funky soundtrack. Based on the fashion and hair-style, I was assuming more of a go-go soundtrack, but instead got surprised with "wanka-wanka" bass grooves and bongo drums. Good thing Mikel had an decent understanding of popular music at this juncture. As I just said, the action sequences were just how I like them....over the fuckin' top. There wasn't a gunfire in the flick the wasn't accompanied by liberal usage of blood pellets, and there was more than enough gunfire. Sure, the Japanese cinema of this time were steps ahead in the gore department, but I wasn't expecting a movie as great as Lady Snowblood. It was enough to keep my eyes open and on the screen.

I enjoyed The Doll Squad and would have no problem watching over and over again, as long as I had crew and the drinks were flowing like a waterfall. This would be the perfect background movie for a loud-as-fuck dive bar, and I'm sure it exists in several bar collections, especially here in NYC. If you are more interested in viewing it on based on it's history in the era of exploitation or supposed inspiration for a certain popular 70's show, it's also going to be a fun watch if you chose to see it solo, sober, or both.

They Call Her One Eye(1974)

I have inadvertently been watching a lot if revenge flicks over the last couple of months, and not those of the overcoming underdog variety where the geek gets the girl, although there have been a couple of those too. I'm talking about the down and dirty rapey variety with innocents being pushed over the edge. The ones where the victim becomes the aggressor, and makes her abuser pay tenfold for his crimes. Yes folks, I'm talking about some of the hardest exploitation films to watch, and not because they ate badly made. Within the last month I jar watched both I Spit On Your Grave(original and new release) and Last House On The Left. Two important genre films I had avoided for so long due to subject matter, but finally brought myself to watch lately due to a girlfriend's love of horror and to get it over with. Neither were as horrid as I had heard, and I'm kind of glad I got them out of they way just for conversation value in the future. That conversation is for another time and place because this post is about a movie I wandered upon without putting it into the same closet with the previous revenge flicks. I had been watching Grindhouse trailers on Youtube, as I do quite a bit, and came upon the exploitation/ruffie/revenge masterpiece They Call Her One Eye(1974) aka Thriller: A Cruel Picture, but I like the first title better. It just screams 70's trash. I can't really lump One Eye with the previous mentioned movie because even though it was similar in subject matter, stylistically and direction wise it blows the other two out of the water. It was actually a well made exploitation piece.

They Call Her One Eye is the story of Friga, a young, country girl who has a bit of an issue with her communication skills. You see, Friga is mute due to a traumatic encounter with a scary old bum 15 years previous. Her parents have spent their entire life and funds doing everything they could to help Friga get past the pain, but nothing seems to work, including regular therapy sessions in the city (I'm assuming it's Stockholm). When Friga misses the bus to therapy one day, she is picked up by a sharp-looking playboy who goes by the name of Tony. Upon arrival into the "City", our young lech has convinced the extremely silent Friga out to an expensive dinner and drinks, which lowers the trauma vitims shields to the point where she agrees to go back to his ultra-modern bachelor pad for a nightcap. What she doesn't know is that Tony's intentions aren't very good, as the mickeyed glass of wine he feeds her will attest. When Friga wakes up a couple days later, she is a bit angry to find out that Tony has not only been feeding her heroin, but also has big plans to force her into prostitution. Unfortunately for her first John, Friga isn't going down without a fight, and mangles the old pervert's face like a feral cat. Of course, this makes Pimp-In-Charge Tony a bit mad, so he takes out his frustration on her left eye, rendering her broken with an eye patch and no depth perception. On top of that, she has also been forced heroin so many times during the "breaking" process that she has become a junkie. How will she ever get out of this one?

Thankfully, all One Eye needs is saved cash tips and one day a week, over time, to train in Badassery. With a little judo, defensive driving and firearm instruction Tony and all her abusers are about to find out that you can only push someone so far before they come back at you with a sawed-off shotgun!

I got a lot more out of One Eye than I thought I was expecting. As I said before, it was actually a well made movie with a decent storyline and direction. The acting could have been better, but considering that most of the cast were sex filmed trained, it held up. I was especially impressed with the use of ambient and synthetic noise in the background used in place of actual dialog throughout most of the movie. Whoever scored this movie did a great job of portraying terror on film. I could actually feel myself getting anxious during the high tension scenes, and that doesn't happen very often.

One thing you have to remember is that this film is Swedish and from the 70's. If you don't know what that means I'll tell you in two words.....full penetration scenes. We're not talking about run-of-the-mill American exploitation overrun with breast and boob shots, we're talking full on fucking, even if a stunt dick and vagina were used. It was still the real thing, which is what Swedish Cinema in the 70's was known for. So if you get freaked out by real sex on film, They Call Her One Eye is not for you.

The film also could have saved itself 10 to 15 minutes on the duration if less slo-mo was used. I understand that the slow motion helped with dramatic impact and action sequences, but it got to be a little too much at times. It was like that long, drawn out joke in every episode of Family Guy. The joke that goes on for two more minutes than it needs to just to annoy the audience. This is how I felt through at least one action sequence.

All and all, I got something I wasn't expecting while watching One Eye, a good movie. If you crave something more from your exploitation than boobs, gore, and Pam Grier, I would recommend it in a second. If sex on film scares you, don't bother. If you love bad-ass women with eye patches, go for the gold!!

70's Skinflick Double Feature Saturday Night at Midnight

I may not be too interested in Spectacle Theater's Midnite pick for Friday, but they have more than made up for it with a 42nd Street-style double feature on Saturday Night. I'm not much of a perv myself, but getting to see these two classics on a double bill isn't going to happen too many more times in my life, if at all.

The show starts at midnight with the film that brought porn to the masses, Deep Throat(1972).

IMDB says - "Linda, frustrated that her hugely energetic sex life leaves her unsatisfied, seeks medical help. The doctor informs her that the reason for her problem is that her clitoris is mistakenly located at the back of her throat - but there is a very simple remedy, which the doctor, and various other men, proceed to demonstrate..."



There aren't many movies out there that can top the Linda Lovelace classic. If any movie can do it, it would have to be the Devil in Miss Jones(1973).

IMBD says - "Miss Jones is tired of her life and commits suicide. She comes to a place where its decided if she will end up in Heaven or Hell. Because of her suicide she should go to Hell but she has the option to return to Earth and live life according to one of the mortal sins for some time. She picks lust and a few days of carnal pleasure follows."

Saturday, April 2nd at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Big Screen Big Apple- The Death Wheelers(1973) Friday March 11 at Midnight

Awwww... and now on to my favorite part of the week...The What is Spectacles Midnite Movie Show! This Friday night we have The Death Wheelers(1973), also known as Psychomania, Britain's answer to the Bikerspoitation movie. Like a lot of these late-era biker movies, The Death Wheelers isn't just another movie based on the life of Sonny Barger. Nope, not at all. Like the trash classic Werewolves on Wheels, this particular biker movie involves our 1%ers dabbling in the supernatural. Ain't it great!

IMDB says -"A gang of young people call themselves the Living Dead. They terrorize the population from their small town. After an agreement with the devil, if they kill themselves firmly believing in it, they will survive and gain eternal life. Following their leader, they commit suicide one after the other, but things don't necessarily turn out as expected..."

I can seriously never get enough of this shit. Bikers, Satanism, zombies, and the Glory of Britain...this movie has to be a masterpiece. I gonna have to go just so I can do a review of a film this epic.

Friday, March 11th at Midnight @ Spectacle 124 S. 3rd St., (at Bedford Ave.)Williamsburg, Brooklyn

Big Screen Big Apple- The Wolves(1971)Friday March 11 at 7:30 PM

There is a whole bunch of shit going down this weekend ans it's going to be really hard for me to keep up with everything. Between two kick-ass film series and the midnight standards over at The Spectacle, There is nothing short of boredom going on for New Yorkers when it comes to genre cinema.

Let me kick it off with night three of The Japan Society's Hardest Men in Town: Yakuza Chronicles of Sin, Sex & Violence film series. Hideo Gosha's The Wolves(1971) hits the screen at 7:30 followed by a gangsta party in which those who show up in a kimono get free entry.

The Japan Society says - "Directed by award-winning filmmaker Hideo Gosha (Sword of the Beast) and scored by Kurosawa's legendary composer, Masaru Sato (Yojimbo, Throne of Blood), The Wolves features Tatsuya Nakadai (Harakiri, Ran, Kagemusha), who leads an all-star cast (alongside real-life yakuza-turned-actor Noboru Ando) and outstares the whole film with impossibly hollow and haunted eyes. In 1929, to celebrate the Showa Emperor Hirohito's ascension to the throne, hundreds of yakuza were pardoned and released from jail--men who, perhaps, would have been better off behind bars. As Seiji Iwahashi, one of these men, comes to realize, their world is disintegrating from moral rot and he finds himself at the tattered edge of what he takes to be civilization and the shattered remains of a once honorable underworld. The essential thrust of the tale--of uprooted men, strangers in a strange world--feels as acute and sharp as samurai sword, while the mood of resigned bitterness, hard to shake off, wafts through the film like incense. "

Friday, March 11th 7:30 PM @ Japan Society, 333 East 47th Street, at 47th Street and First Avenue